I might need to fill you in real quick on my family. My dad is the oldest of 6 kids and while my family was living in Florida, all my cousins and aunts and uncles were living in North Carolina. Needless to say, I'm not super close with them and holiday's can be a little awkward for everyone. Until the booze come out then it's awkward for another reason. But that's not this story.
I am the second oldest cousin, I'm three years (I think) younger than Princess. I got married two years ago, the first grandchild to get married. Hell, I was the first grandchild to have A) a steady boyfriend, B) to bring a boy to any family function, C) invited MY family to HIS family functions. We had a lovely wedding, very, VERY small. Just grandparents (some of them) and his best friend and mine. We didn't want a big hoopla and frankly, I didn't feel it was right for either one of our parents to shell out money that could be used as a down payment for a house for a wedding. They've done more than enough for us over the years. After our wedding we had a big, huge party. Very informal (so informal, my dad didn't tuck in his shirt and I think Andrew was the only one wearing a tie. No joke). And it was great. Everyone had a great time and it didn't feel stuffy and wedding like.
Anywho, not everyone in my family showed up for the wedding due to health issues, money issues, etc. That's cool. I completely understood. Sure, I was a little bummed but I got it. Things happen. Life goes on.
So Princess gets engaged and it's all 'happy happy joy joy' because she's the Queen of the World and all. Then I found out her wedding date.
DUM DUM DUUUUUUUM
Can't go. I'm already in a wedding that weekend. Like, I'm actually part of the wedding party. Sorry. I just can't back out of a wedding after I already gave my word I'd be a bridesmaid.
This did not go over well at all. I got angry emails from my dad's family demanding that I drop out of wedding #1 so I can be with the family. My parents were getting phone calls from the same family telling them to tell me to be at wedding #2 (hello! I'm 25 years old and no longer fear being grounded by my parents). Even during the few visits to my nanna (that'd be my dad's mother) earlier this year, she'd drop rude comments about how I need to 'be with the family' that weekend and not 'with a friend'. But I'm the bigger person and would just kindly respond with 'I'm sorry but I've already made a promise to do this and I can't back out now'.
I think they finally get it. Maybe. I did see nanna over the weekend and she said something about how she hopes to see me at the wedding.
Ok, so that's the back story. For the most part. I left out the part of my grandmother (my mommy's mom, who I was really close to and spent many, many summers at her house. They lived in Florida near my parents while my sister and I were growing up) DIED TWO DAYS BEFORE MY WEDDING!!! Yeah. True story. I can't make that shit up. She literally died in a car wreck two days before my wedding. Like, the night before she was supposed to ride out the mountains for the wedding. It sucks, I know. You can take this moment to feel bad for me. I am.
Ok, and we're moving on.
So, I'm at the bridal shower for Princess with my mommy. We had this sorta tag-team system going on since we're outsiders to this family. Never left each other alone for more than a few minutes. Safety in numbers you know? Well, the time for presents came. We're watching as Princess opens gifts and she does the whole 'awww this is pretty. I love it so much'. Really? You LOVE plastic Tupperware bowls? At least register for something cool. Like art work or pretty bedding. All her shit was kitchen stuff. BORING!
By this time I'm really bored and ready to go but I'm doing the right thing by faking the smile and laughter. 'Ooohing' and 'awwwing' with everyone else. Then she gets to the gift from my nanna. Inside the bag is this super expensive collectors bear in a wedding dress. It's cute, I guess. But I'm guessing it's expensive by what Princess and her mom were saying. Oh, but that's not all! There, in the same bag, was a set of pearl earrings and a pearl necklace. REAL PEARLS! Not that I'm a pearl type of person but all the same.
You know what I got from nanna? A box from the dollar store (it still had the tag on it) that holds recipes.
Yeah.
I know, the gift isn't the point, it's the thought that counts. I'm adult enough to know that. But the thing is, her wedding and all things related to her wedding are so much more important than mine. We invited the same family members and all the ones that weren't coming to mine, including my grandpa on my dad's side, are coming. All the family from Boston, didn't come to my reception but they're coming for hers. When people said they weren't going to be at my wedding, my parents didn't send mean emails or make angry phone calls. There were no backhanded comments.
I understand that I might not be part of the IN crowd but I am part of the family. It's only fair that you treat me with the same respect you treat the other grandchildren.
And they wonder why I don't come around more often. Maybe if you'd didn't treat me like the red headed step child, I'd be more than happy to deal with your snotty and holier than thou attitudes.
So I leave with my mom, all sad and sorta feeling....I don't know. I don't want to say unloved because that might be too much with the dramatics. But I felt something and whatever it wasn't, it didn't feel good.
I'm going to need someone to buy me these for me. It'll make things a whole lot better.
OH! The good news is, my Vegas trip is ALMOST taken care of. Technically, it is taken care of. Flight, hotel, concert ticket, all booked and paid for. Only, I'm now having to pay back for the concert ticket and my half of the hotel room. But it's cool. I'm getting very, very excited!!
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