Boys, boys, boys

I'm a little chipper on this beautiful day so I'm going to write about something else, other than shoes, that I love.

BOYS!!

I love boys. In fact, I'm a little boy crazy. I take that back, I'm a lot boy crazy. They're just so pretty! I don't even really have a type. As my mother would say, 'so long as they're male'. That's how I like 'em.

I have a group of friends affectionately known as the Power Rangers and we all have a husband list. At least I think we all do. I know I do and I know two others do.

After a dream I had last night, I've decided to add another boy to my husband list. After of course checking to make sure no one else has claimed him. **It was not a dirty dream either! In fact the guy didn't even talk. He was just standing there all sexy like. *sigh*

Without further ado, here is my list:

Jim Sturgess


Chris Evans


Jonathan Groff (I don't care that he's gay in real life, he's going to marry me!)


Jared Padalecki (he's the one I had the weird dream about last night. So pretty)


Luke Kirby (side note: one of the Power Rangers and my favorite people ever made me watch this show when I went to visit with her a few weeks ago, Slings & Arrows. YOU MUST WATCH IT!! Amazingness)



*sigh* Nothing like a little eye candy in the morning.

Now, if you know me, you know my undying love for all that is Justin Timberlake. And yes, he is still on the list and still the recipient of my love. However, he's more of a boyfriend now. Or maybe we have an open relationship. Yeah, we have an open relationship. It's been many, many years that we've shared this love so I feel I can share him with others. But never fear, he will always be in my heart.

So, now that my eyes are all starry from the pretty, I'd like to take a second to say that I love Glee. It's right up there with my love for shoes. There is not one single thing I don't like about it. I love that Rachel Berry is annoying as fuckall. I love that poor Finn can't dance his way out of a paper bag. How Artie is the whitest white boy alive and talks like he's from the hood. Kurt and Mercedes have this inner confidence I wish I had just a spoonful of. And Brittany, Brittany, Brittany. How do I love thee, let me count thy ways.

Honestly, Heather Morris NAILS this character. She has the best one liners of any show I've seen. You can't deny that. In fact, I'd like to share a few:

"Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?"

"People think I went on vacation, but actually I spent all summer lost in the sewers."

"When I pulled my hamstring I went to a misogynist."

And this one, never, EVER fails to make me laugh out loud. No, really.

Will: "Can anyone tell me what a ballad is?"
Brittany: "It's a male duck."

Now, the feelings I have for this show and this character, throw them into the pot with Britney Spears and what do you get?



Only, me and not as a baby. I'm sorta sad the husband won't be home to watch it with me tonight but I'm also kinda glad he won't be there to see me geek the fuck out.

Simply because the shoes are named Miss Meghan. Also, designer is Nicholas Kirkwood who I've just recently fallen in love with.

My heel would love to meet your face

Ok. Fuck this bitch. Honestly some people should be allowed to speak let alone live. I'm not one to actually want to hurt people (most days anyways) but today, today feels like a good day for it.

I'm going to vent a little. If you don't want to read this or are already aware of my dislike for the people I work with, please feel free to avoid this post.

I work with this woman. I say woman but she's more like the dragon lady. See?


Because I'm not a heartless bitch, I'm going to protect her by not using her real name. However some of you probably know who I'm referring to. Either way, I'm going to name her Asshole. Yeah, I totally went there.

I've been working at this office for almost 8 months as the office manager. A position I've pretty much been doing for 4 years. I've done an excellent job thus far with no issues from previous employers or my current boss. Yes, I am bragging a little.

But this Asshole! She's been working for my boss for several years now and they've got a great work chemistry going on. That's awesome. Honestly. It makes the work flow a little easier when you know someone well enough to just do things without second guessing or having to go ask. And it was helpful to me when I first started, having Asshole know all the ins and outs of my boss. But now, I've been here long enough to be able to make these judgment calls and decisions myself. I'm the office MANAGER. You are the nurse.

Let me take a second to tell you something about me. I HATE HATE HATE when people step all over my toes and try to do my job for me. For any reason. Like I said earlier, if I wasn't doing my job to par, I'd know about it by now. Clearly, I'm not having any issues. So step off. I don't need you telling me how to do something that a monkey could do. Just because you can't remember how to do it properly doesn't mean I have the IQ of a cardboard box. It's like.... you know when you go out of town or miss a few days from being sick and someone in your office covers for you? Of course they're not going to do as good a job as you but when I come in and have to do it all over again? Not cool. The thought of coming back here after a week in Vegas causes me to hyperventilate.

Because Asshole was out of town last week, she has a ton of work to play catch up with (I won't even get into the replacement nurse drama we had last week. I will say that one of them, she just walked out in the middle of the day and didn't come back). She left in such a rush yesterday afternoon that she left practically all that work sitting in her station. She said three times, THREE TIMES, that she'd be here today at 7:30 to get it done. I don't have to be here when she's here in the morning but I feel like I should be. So I wake up, exhausted from being at bridal portraits til 10 last night, haul ass to get here on time and that Asshole doesn't show up until after 8:30!! If you can't follow through on something, I lose some respect for you. Especially if it pertains to your job. If you say you're going to do it, then fucking do it. Otherwise there are thousands of people who would be more than happy to have your job these days.

Now that I've vented all angry like about Asshole I feel I should share some of the stuff that makes me laugh about her. Laughing behind her back of course.

Homegirl is 50 years old. Sure she looks great for her age, I can admit that. But some things you just shouldn't wear. Ever. There were several days this summer where there was no doctor in the office so we were allowed to wear jeans and be casual. Now because we work in an office, people do stop by from time to time. Patients, sales reps, nurses from other offices, you get the picture. The point is, even though there are no patients or doctors in the office, you still need to look like a person. Not a hooker.

There were days where she's be in tiny skirts and shorts that even I wouldn't wear. Looking classically sexy is better than looking trashy every.single.day. Boobs were hanging out, hooker heels (I have hooker heels but work is NEVER EVER the place for them!), make up done up in her best 'going out, Saturday night' look. I really wanted to tell her that I'd be more than happy to style her but when someone is that age and going through a divorce, it just didn't feel right.

Another thing I won't tolerate, is someone lying about me. I. AM. NOT. A. LIAR. And for someone to accuse me and attack me about how I handle myself in the work and professional environment is not going to be tolerated. End of story.

If I find out that you've lied about me, to me, ect, this happens.



Flogging. Lots and lots of flogging. I might even get your face. Scarlett letter style if you lie on me.

Word.

In other news, sad news actually. The memorial service for Alexander McQueen was this week and EVERYONE was there. Not, EVERYone cause I wasn't there but you catch my drift. My style Icon with a capital I, Sarah Jessica Parker was there looking STUNNING!! I know it was a super sad thing and I feel a little ashamed for looking at the pictures to see whatever was wearing but come on, it was for McQueen! Of course everyone was going to look great.

Case in point:

'Tis the season

When you picture volunteer at a museum does she look like this?



Yeah, I thought so. I'm volunteering at the NC Museum of History and this woman, dude. She's like a super know-it-all. She seems nice enough, and by that I mean I've only said a handful of words to her. But anyways, I don't really have anything to say other than that. There really was no point but I was there last night and she was there and it was fresh on the brain this morning.

So, last Friday. It went down. It was C's bachelorette party (you like how I'm not naming people? haha). And this is the same girl that's been all crazy bride girl and the one that I had to bail outta jail for DUI, blah blah blah (that's a whole other story for a day when I feel I wanna write you a novel. Today is not that day). I was only going because my hetro life mate, L, was gonna be there. And to my surprise, my oldest friend Special K. We met at the hotel, pregamed, walked a few blocks to dinner, they drank some more. Then took a cab to the bar/club thing where it really got poppin'. (Don't ask why I'm talking all weird cause I don't really know) I lost count of shots after 4 and two beers (not counting what we had at the hotel), so it's safe to say the bride to be was more than a little toasted. After shaking her ass both on the piano and the stage, we moved to the back part of the bar (also known as 'da club') where she could really get down with her funky self.

It looked a little bit like this, only with a few more clothes on. A FEW. Like, shoes.


I was having fun at this point. Until Special K left. Then A and D left right around midnight. Leaving myself and L with just the bride and her sister. Bad plan people.

I had been super sick all week and had to be up early for a class at the museum but that does not matter to a princess bride. She sorta went psycho, stabby girl and screamed at us in the bar and then outside on the sidewalk. No, no. You don't understand. She SCREAMED at us. It's her 'god damn wedding' and 'how many fucking times does she get married?'.

......She's already married!!! But we've talked about that already.

I'm gonna shorten this long story by saying, finally got drunky drunk in the car after 2 am. It looked like this, only in a bed and a little more classy



Once I dropped both her and her sister off at the hotel and I drove my happy ass home to get four hours of sleep. At the time, it was not so fun but the next day, once I had time to reflect, I had a good time. I know, I'm just as shocked as you are. She was on her bestish behavior and didn't act like a diva bitch until the end of the night. And I use the term bitch with complete love.

I may or may not post some pictures from that night. I haven't made up my mind yet since there's incriminating evidence on there.

*huge sigh* So, now that that's done and over with. I've got nothing going on until the wedding next month and then VEGAS!! Can I get a hell yeah?!? I'm stoked! I paid S back all the money I owe her for the concert tickets and the hotel. I'm free from the weight of debt for this trip and can just enjoy the painful wait for the next 33 days until this vacation starts.

It's almost my favorite time of the year for fashion. FALL!! I love all the sweaters, the jackets, the pants, the SHOOOOEEEESS!! More specific, the boots. I die for boots! DIE! I buy more boots than I know what to do with. But I get my money out of them. It's shame I'm going to have to buy new clothes to wear my current boots with this fall. New job means no jeans at work so I gotta figure something out. But hey, maybe new clothes mean new shoes! See, there's always a silver lining.

And Brian Atwood is the new love of my life. Since I've got a birthday coming up, I'm going to need these.