The joys of family

So, this past weekend I went to a bridal shower for my cousin. I wish I could come up with a more clever name but I'm too sleepy so we'll just go with Princess. Mostly because she honestly thinks she is one.

I might need to fill you in real quick on my family. My dad is the oldest of 6 kids and while my family was living in Florida, all my cousins and aunts and uncles were living in North Carolina. Needless to say, I'm not super close with them and holiday's can be a little awkward for everyone. Until the booze come out then it's awkward for another reason. But that's not this story.

I am the second oldest cousin, I'm three years (I think) younger than Princess. I got married two years ago, the first grandchild to get married. Hell, I was the first grandchild to have A) a steady boyfriend, B) to bring a boy to any family function, C) invited MY family to HIS family functions. We had a lovely wedding, very, VERY small. Just grandparents (some of them) and his best friend and mine. We didn't want a big hoopla and frankly, I didn't feel it was right for either one of our parents to shell out money that could be used as a down payment for a house for a wedding. They've done more than enough for us over the years. After our wedding we had a big, huge party. Very informal (so informal, my dad didn't tuck in his shirt and I think Andrew was the only one wearing a tie. No joke). And it was great. Everyone had a great time and it didn't feel stuffy and wedding like.

Anywho, not everyone in my family showed up for the wedding due to health issues, money issues, etc. That's cool. I completely understood. Sure, I was a little bummed but I got it. Things happen. Life goes on.

So Princess gets engaged and it's all 'happy happy joy joy' because she's the Queen of the World and all. Then I found out her wedding date.

DUM DUM DUUUUUUUM

Can't go. I'm already in a wedding that weekend. Like, I'm actually part of the wedding party. Sorry. I just can't back out of a wedding after I already gave my word I'd be a bridesmaid.

This did not go over well at all. I got angry emails from my dad's family demanding that I drop out of wedding #1 so I can be with the family. My parents were getting phone calls from the same family telling them to tell me to be at wedding #2 (hello! I'm 25 years old and no longer fear being grounded by my parents). Even during the few visits to my nanna (that'd be my dad's mother) earlier this year, she'd drop rude comments about how I need to 'be with the family' that weekend and not 'with a friend'. But I'm the bigger person and would just kindly respond with 'I'm sorry but I've already made a promise to do this and I can't back out now'.

I think they finally get it. Maybe. I did see nanna over the weekend and she said something about how she hopes to see me at the wedding.

Ok, so that's the back story. For the most part. I left out the part of my grandmother (my mommy's mom, who I was really close to and spent many, many summers at her house. They lived in Florida near my parents while my sister and I were growing up) DIED TWO DAYS BEFORE MY WEDDING!!! Yeah. True story. I can't make that shit up. She literally died in a car wreck two days before my wedding. Like, the night before she was supposed to ride out the mountains for the wedding. It sucks, I know. You can take this moment to feel bad for me. I am.

Ok, and we're moving on.

So, I'm at the bridal shower for Princess with my mommy. We had this sorta tag-team system going on since we're outsiders to this family. Never left each other alone for more than a few minutes. Safety in numbers you know? Well, the time for presents came. We're watching as Princess opens gifts and she does the whole 'awww this is pretty. I love it so much'. Really? You LOVE plastic Tupperware bowls? At least register for something cool. Like art work or pretty bedding. All her shit was kitchen stuff. BORING!

By this time I'm really bored and ready to go but I'm doing the right thing by faking the smile and laughter. 'Ooohing' and 'awwwing' with everyone else. Then she gets to the gift from my nanna. Inside the bag is this super expensive collectors bear in a wedding dress. It's cute, I guess. But I'm guessing it's expensive by what Princess and her mom were saying. Oh, but that's not all! There, in the same bag, was a set of pearl earrings and a pearl necklace. REAL PEARLS! Not that I'm a pearl type of person but all the same.

You know what I got from nanna? A box from the dollar store (it still had the tag on it) that holds recipes.

Yeah.

I know, the gift isn't the point, it's the thought that counts. I'm adult enough to know that. But the thing is, her wedding and all things related to her wedding are so much more important than mine. We invited the same family members and all the ones that weren't coming to mine, including my grandpa on my dad's side, are coming. All the family from Boston, didn't come to my reception but they're coming for hers. When people said they weren't going to be at my wedding, my parents didn't send mean emails or make angry phone calls. There were no backhanded comments.

I understand that I might not be part of the IN crowd but I am part of the family. It's only fair that you treat me with the same respect you treat the other grandchildren.

And they wonder why I don't come around more often. Maybe if you'd didn't treat me like the red headed step child, I'd be more than happy to deal with your snotty and holier than thou attitudes.

So I leave with my mom, all sad and sorta feeling....I don't know. I don't want to say unloved because that might be too much with the dramatics. But I felt something and whatever it wasn't, it didn't feel good.

I'm going to need someone to buy me these for me. It'll make things a whole lot better.



OH! The good news is, my Vegas trip is ALMOST taken care of. Technically, it is taken care of. Flight, hotel, concert ticket, all booked and paid for. Only, I'm now having to pay back for the concert ticket and my half of the hotel room. But it's cool. I'm getting very, very excited!!

Poor Callie

I wasn't going to be posting anything today or for the rest of the week BUT I had to do this.

So I have 4 dogs. Yeah, I know. Who has 4 dogs? Well, I do. I love them and since I will never had children (that's another story for another time) these giant balls of fur are my babies. There's Abbie (or Mufasa as she's been renamed), Sadie, Maddison and Callie. Callie is the baby and a mommy's girl. I won't go as far as to say she hates Andrew but she doesn't really care for him either. It's kinda cute and one of the things I love most about her. She's all mine and I don't have to share her with anyone.

Well, last night I woke up around 1:30 needing to pee. It was like, if I don't go now, I'm going to wet the bed and then I'd have to take a shower and doing all that, at that time of the night, not really high on my list of priorities. Anywho, so I get up, I can hear some thunder off in the distance and I'm praying it's leaving so I can go back to sleep.

That was not the case.

This storm, if you can even call it that. I like to think of it as God (if you believe in such things) throwing boulders down around my house. I mean, between the thunder and lightening, it was like I was sitting front row, center for the opening of Phantom of the Opera or something. (Side note, go see that if you haven't. It will change your life.) The house and windows were shaking and I didn't need to turn on any lights to see anything. The lightening was doing that for me.

Most nights I sleep alone because Andrew snores and neither one of us can sleep. I can't sleep because he's snoring and he can't sleep because I "beat him up". I'm not really buying that but whatever.

So there I was, back in bed with Callie and Sadie and then all of the sudden, it was like a cannon went off in my room. Poor Callie let out a yelp and scampered from the foot of the bed to right beside me. Picture it like this, it was more me spooning her than anything else. So, I'm laying there. Holding this poor shaking puppy who is scared half to death and then there's another scary boom of thunder. This time laying beside me isn't good enough. This crazy dog crawls up on top of the pillow that I keep over my head (whatever, so I sleep with a pillow over my head. I'm sure you do weird things in your sleep too) and lays on top of my head.

It took me a good ten minutes to get her off of me. I'm surprised I didn't die because breathing....not so easy under a 50 lbs dog and pillow. Needless to say, sleeping was not an option during this storm. I spent the better part of three hours laying with her and trying to calm her down. And of course, once she calms down, I'm wide awake and can't go back to sleep.

Yeah, last night sucked and I'm exhausted. So no shoe today. I'm too tired and this stupid computer at work is too slow. Maybe I'll double up on the shoes next time.

I am a golden god!

Yes, I FINALLY got around to watching 'Almost Famous'. I know, I know. I hear you. I know the movie came out like, I don't know ten years ago or something. Point is, I finally saw it. And now I'm mad I waited so long to see it. It was (and I'm going to quote my friend S right now) perfect. Honestly. I can't think of one thing I didn't like about it. Even Kate Hudson, who I don't really care that much for. She's just... kinda there. In the world that is. I watched the entire movie saying to myself 'self, this guy that plays Russell looks really effin' familiar'. Then the credits roll. DUH! How did I not know it was Billy Crudup?!? I really think something has made my brain all mushy and soft. Either way, the movie was amazing and needs to be seen by all.

Other than that, I have nothing super important to say. I'm working on my Netfix list which is slowly but surely sucking my soul right out of me. Between the instant movies (most of mine are just TV shows) and the movies they mail out, I may never leave my house again. Or, I may never leave because I'm broke.

I watched 'Michael Clayton' last night. It was good. Really good in fact. But I have a problem following movies where there's no background given when it starts. Sure, they tied up all the pieces at the end but up until that point, I was sorta lost. Even if it had sucked balls, I probably would have finished it anyways. Two words: George. Clooney. What more can you ask for in a movie? Oh, wait. You can ask for this, Leonardo DiCaprio. After 'Inception' I've fallen in love with him all over again. He makes my soul happy (when it isn't being owned by Netflix that is).

Me thinks I have a problem with jeweled shoes. So pretty.

The best things in life are free....

Guess who's broke?

If you guessed me then please line up for you gold star prize.

This year has been not so fun with the money stuff. And I'm actually not to blame for it this time. Well, I might be but not really. My car, who I've affectionately renamed Dipshit, broke down before I went to New York in March and stayed broken until about a week ago. I think I just needed to reach said dollar amount in order for it to not be broke anymore. That dollar amount, by the way, was over two grand. Yikes is right.

So now I'm having to scrimp and save every penny for this trip to Vegas in October. I can do it and I am doing it but it SUCKS. I need things and can't get them right now. And I actually do need things, this isn't just me saying I "need" when I really want. I, honest to goodness, need some clothes for work. I've also got two bridal showers coming up in the next month, two weddings in October, this trip, new brakes for my car. Like, it's a never ending game of 'what can happen next?'. And I'm ready to throw in the towel and tell the powers that be, that they've won. I quit.

So, my very dear friend (yes, I'm talking to you) hated a pair of Dior shoes I found in Vogue this month. She said I only liked them becaue they're Dior. Not really the case. They were pretty and reminded me of a pair of shoes I already own. So, in honor of that (not that I'm a huge fan of the designer cause I'm usually not) I give you these

Bridezilla

Bridezilla. Probably one of the scariest words known to women kind. For me at least. I got married a little over two years ago and I'm pretty sure I was a fairly chill bride. No yelling, no crazy demands. I could have played the whole 'I'm a bride, do what I say' thing but that's not me. I get called a bitch enough, bitchy bride I was not going to be. But I've got this friend and I love her. Really, I do. But she is really getting out of control with all this wedding nonsense. I mean, if I can't make it to your batchelorette party, I'm sorry. I'm in your freaking wedding. I've already shelled out money for the dress, my hair/make up, your present, your bridal shower. Going out of town for your "last weekend as a single lady", two months before you know I'm going on vacation, is not going to happen. Between the twenty texts asking if I got this invite or that invite or did I make the appointment to get my hair done. It makes me want to scream.

But here's the thing that KILLS me about all this. SHE'S ALREADY FREAKIN' MARRIED!! They got married in Vegas (please, kill me with the irony already) and no one knows but myself and two other girls. I sorta get why they did it. He's in the army, he's in Iraq, the benefits they both get now that according to law, they're one with the holy matrimony. Sure, I'm OK with that. But she hasn't told anyone and is STILL having her platinum wedding. No, really. The budget has gotten bigger as the date gets closer. Last time I heard, they were up to $70K. That's $70,000. Do you not understand how much money that is?!? I had a destination wedding. My parents paid for the few from my side, my husbands parents paid for the few from his side. Then we had a big, huge party a few weeks later. Open bar, of course. Both side of the family are Irish. They can put it away like no one else. With all that said and done, we didn't even come close to $10 grand. Not even close. And I did the whole thing. The dress, the hair (twice even! Once for the actual wedding and once for the reception), the food, the flowers, the DJ, all that wedding stuff. I did it. But this chick....God. She wants a wedding, not a marriage.

Please my age should not get married. Honestly. I love my husband, he's a great guy and sure, sometimes I want to punch him in the throat. But I'm 25 years old for Christ's sake. I've been with the guy since I was 18 years old. If I'd known then what I know now, never, ever would I have gotten married. I think there needs to be some rule, or law even, that you can't get married until you're 30. That way you know who you are and what you want in life. Cause, let me tell you, I am not the same person I was when I met him. Hell, I'm not the same person I was last year. Changing and growing and figuring out who you are is part of life. Getting married because you think it's the right thing to do, because all your friends are doing it, makes it a mistake.

Honestly thought, I'm glad I did. I give him (my husband that is) a lot of flack and talk about him to my girlfriends but he's really great.

So I was at the mall this past weekend with an old friend from high school and found a pair of shoes that I NEED in my life. If anyone wants to loan me $200 to get them, I'll make you some cookies or a cake or something. In the meantime, I'll just have to look at these. No, these aren't the same ones but they're pretty all the same. And yes, Alexander McQueen makes my soul happy. Right to the core of my soul.

So I'm a screw up

So I was just informed that the URL for this blog reads myfriend,thecuteshow. THE CUTE SHOW!! I'm trying really hard not to laugh but I can't help it.

I told you. I'm special ed.

Oh well.

I'm back....sorta

Ok, so I had a blog. No, not this one, a different one. But I'm sorta special ed (I didn't ride the short bus or eat glue if you're wondering) and I can't remember what my log in was for said blog. So I made a new one. A better one if you will. And by better, I mean, I'm going to actually use it and update it. I know, shocker. Didn't mean to rattle your core there but it will happen this time.

I'm in a place. A weird place. Well, I'm actually sitting on my couch right now but mentally I mean. For the last year or so I've had this overwhelming urge to just pack up my stuff and move. Anywhere. Scratch that. New York would be my first choice. I fucking LOVE the city. Honestly, there isn't one thing about it that I don't like. The people, the places, the insane traffic, and this is gross, but even the smell. I think I romanticize about it. I love the city like I love a person. Eh, I'm weird, I know. I just went a few months ago with my BFF and had the BEST time. Met up with some very special people to me, celebrated a birthday for one of these very special people, took in some sights I hadn't yet seen. In short, I did the whole shebang. And couldn't get enough of it. I mean, look at it.

How could you not feel something when you see that? I know this is totally cliche, but that saying, if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere, is true. I could be completely wrong (I'm admitting it) but I think you can really find yourself in a city like that. It would force you to grow up and do things that you wouldn't do if you were from, oh say a small town in the middle of North Carolina.

So if I even win the lotto or something crazy like that, you know what my plans will be. Pack up and move to the city that never sleeps.

In closing (how ever proper of me) I think I'll end each posting with a photo of a cute shoe. Seeing as how I love shoes like I love New York.